I’m so much better at reduction than expansion. (Well, except when it comes to words. I’m working on being less indulgent guys. Bear with me.) When it comes to possessions, clothes, plans, or anything else, I can always prioritize and cut the fat.
It’s the practice of adding, that I have yet to master. This comes up a lot for me right now, because, well...I’m expanding. Physically. As in my waist-line. As in my bust. As in my ass. I’ve got a tiny human expanding me from the inside.
Some days I see it for mind-blowing phenomenon that it is, and other days I’m so resistant. It’s uncomfortable for all the reasons I’m sure you’ve all heard about or experienced yourselves, from maternity clothes to watching the scale numbers rise. This resistance to physical expansion made me realize I’m uncomfortable with this concept in general.
Learning to say “no” is like a super power. Letting go can even be addictive. When we left half of our belongings behind to downsize apartments, I was euphoric. Then we moved to the new place and realized there was room, glorious room for new items. Turns out simplifying creates space. And emptiness isn’t the ultimate goal. The real goal, is to make room for what matters.
So, that’s the question I’m pondering as the intimidating prospects of clothing a growing belly, creating a home, and stocking a small nursery loom before me. What matters most? What and who do I say “yes” to?
I'm ready to get good at adding and expanding with confidence. Loving the items I take in, the commitments I add to my schedule, the relationships I invest in, the media I engage with, and the ideas I expose myself to. I’d love to get to the point that consciously adding is as addictive as reducing, to the point that constantly reducing becomes unnecessary.
This is a time for expansion. Not just my belly. My heart. My family. My self-awareness. My patience. My capacity for love. My community. My love of home and all it shelters. My understanding of who and what matters most.
Growing can be awkward, it's full of the unknown. So often I'm unsure of how to proceed, and afraid of screwing up. But I believe it's worth it. Just like my swollen belly is worth it.
Anyone else out there learning to consciously say “yes” with me?