Let's cut to the chase, I've been quiet lately. I could give you the list of reasons why, a trip, a sickness, a job, another job... instead I want to give you the truth. When I stopped blogging a few years ago, it was because I found myself writing posts to fix my friends (hi friends, sorry!) I had an addiction to fixing people and would do it anyway I could. When I started writing again I was very hesitant to fall back into the trap of fix-it-friend. I vowed to only write posts for myself, the lessons I learned and the journeys I embarked on.
In the last year, writing on Makeshift, I have felt really good about sticking to my vow. I have had some good material for growth: our move, facilitating a teacher training, making new friends and moving away from loved ones. You could call them struggles, problems, difficulties, or changes, whatever they are they have required some "work" on my end. Work for me to grow and stretch as a human. These experiences, this work, has given me something to write about. Right now, in this moment, and the past few weeks, I have been feeling content.
This feeling of contentment hasn't left me with any sort of "problem" to share about. I am not really going through anything that requires work. I thought "crap I just started blogging again and suddenly I've run out of things to share." When I sat down to write, it's seem daunting and I didn't want to force myself to create content because that just makes me look at other's drama and write for them. So instead of forcing or fixing, I've been riding a wave of contentment.
Some days Lake Michigan, is so still it looks like an magnificent sheet of glass. Other days the waves are huge. There are even days where medium sized rhythmic waves are rolling onto shore. Every single day, Lake Michigan is still called Lake Michigan. Creatively there are times I have huge waves of inspiration, sometimes tiny ones and other times a stillness. Every day that passes big inspiration or no inspiration, I am still a writer, a thinker, a creator. My soul is fluid, it moves with the changes just like the lake moves with the wind. When I think of contentment this way, of a lull in my writing like the stillness of the lake, it doesn't seem like an issue, it's part of the creative process.
For now, I will continue to share what is going on with me, my journey, my life's work and when there is a time of stillness, I am going to float.