What You Say Is So

If you were to ask me to tell you about myself, I would tell you I am a shy, introverted, very serious gal. And truthfully, I believe that. If you were to ask my friends or co-workers? They would tell you I am out going, extroverted, go-with-the-flow and light hearted. When I hear that, I just laugh. Yet, maybe there is some truth in what others see in me?

I remember many times in my life where I felt shy or kept to myself. I use to make my little brother talk to adults for me. There have been plenty of times where I wasn't go-with-the-flow and found myself easily angered by changes in my plans. I have a million stories about how serious I am. But more recently I find myself going to new places, making new friends, talking to more strangers, laughing at more jokes, and rolling with the changes in my plans.

It seems that others may have a better perspective of me in this regard, they may be right! I think I have outgrown "shy". I am afraid of what people think of me. Will they like me? Will they hate me? Will they understand me? It all comes out by me hiding behind the label that I am shy. If I am shy, it excuses my behavior when I hide from you in a Target isle while you pass me by. If I am serious than people are bound to think I am responsible and mature. Therefore they will respect and trust me. These fears seem to feed the perspectives I have about myself.

A teacher once told me, "What you say is so." I really believe that. If I think curry soup is good, no matter if you like it or not, to me it is good. If I say I am tired, I am putting my focus on being tired therefore I am tired. If I say I am introverted, naturally I believe that I am introverted. The problem with labels is once they are given to us, or we give them to ourselves, we feel like we are stuck with that label. Maybe I was shy, introverted and serious but those labels don't work for me anymore. 

If what I say is so, than I am turning on my listening ears and listening for the labels I give myself so that I can flip the script I am using to describe me and choose to use a script that reflects who I truly am. I am brave, I am loving, I am joyful and I am light hearted and that feels amazing!